It’s super easy and you may already be one!
You may know that you are required to report if you are traveling to or from the United States with $10,000 or more in cash. Don’t hop over the Canadian border to buy a used car, for example, or the Feds may confiscate your cash (millions of dollars are confiscated every year). Did you also know that you can’t leave the United States with more than $5 in nickels??? That’s a federal crime punishable by up to five years in prison. How about carrying a metal detector in a national park–up to six months in prison. And God forbid you should use your metal detector and find something more than 100 years old, that can put you away for up to a year. Also illegal in a national park? Making unreasonable gestures to a passing horse.
How to Become a Federal Criminal
Worth re-linking to one of my favorite legal lectures of all time: Don’t Talk to the Police. Even if you are going to tell the truth, even if you did nothing wrong. There is no way it will help you.